Love isn’t how movies portray it. You don’t always find your knight in shining armour, and even if you do, it does not take just one song for him to fall in love with you. Nor does he magically begin to notice the girl who blends into the background.
Love isn’t all sunshine and romance, for everyone. Sometimes it’s thunder and lightening. Sometimes it’s cold and harsh.
And when an introvert falls in love, she falls hard. A chaotic, mind-numbing and all-consuming love. When you are used to the solitude and the silence, the sudden burst of colour in your black and white world is difficult to adapt to. But that doesn’t stop you from diving into the rainbow of feelings. And it doesn’t end there. For when you can’t bring yourself to confess to that very person, the feeling of being in the dark begins to haunt you.
The ‘what if’s and ‘what not’s cause you to spend sleepless nights. You begin to doubt yourself. Of course the love isn’t going to be reciprocated. I mean, why would it be? You’re you. You can’t even manage to say a few words to that person. Even the sound of their name makes your hands shake and butterflies flutter your stomach. Your heart begins a relay race. So how could you handle talking to them? You can’t. And how could they handle loving someone like you? They can’t.
Most people don’t understand how hard it is. They think introverts can just ‘get over it’, ‘just be confident’, ‘try this’ or ‘try that’. I wish it was that easy. I really do. Maybe then, we wouldn’t have to try so hard to be like the ‘others’. What society defines as ‘normal’. But sadly it isn’t easy at all. Everyday is a battle we fight with ourselves. And usually in the end, we lose.
You see? When an introvert falls in love, it doesn’t usually end well.